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The Holdout

SEX, SEX, SEX!! That three letter word. So small, yet

powerful. For some that was the primary reason for marriage.

If you ask the male gender, the ones true to their natural habitat

will admit, yes indeed this is one of the reasons for the nuptials.

However, once the honeymoon phase passes the reality of

adaptation to one another takes place. It could be any number

of things grate or minor. For example, one may have grown up

in a household where the family sits at the dinner table for meals

whereas another may dine in front of the television. Because

this was considered “quality time with family” when your spouse

doesn't accommodate, one may look upon the spouse as being

selfish or inconsiderate. This continues for awhile then

resentment settles in. The time comes for sexual intimacy and

you decline. It isn't an isolated incident, it occurs over and over

and over again. You're “holding out” and feel justified in doing

so because your need isn't being met. As a woman your

perspective is “why should I give him what he wants when he

won't honor my request?” If you really want to know the

answer, take 1Corinthians 7:5 New Living Translation to heart.

Do not deprive each other of sexual relations,

unless you both agree to refrain from sexual

intimacy for a limited time so you can give

yourselves more completely to prayer.

Afterward, you should come together again

so that Satan won't be able to tempt you because

of your lack of self-control.

Now, there are some extenuating circumstances where one

may have to refrain from that intimacy- possibly an illness or

physical ailment, perhaps some form of abuse. Although abuse

in many forms has become common, it does not mean it is

normal. One must seek out the Lord's instruction on how to

handle that situation. I am referring to those who are flat out

refusing to have relations with their mate because they have

taken offense to their actions, behavior or response. Your

“holdout” may not be related to dining at the dinner table, but

whatever it may be you have a responsibility to uphold

according to the instruction manual. Everyone has their own

free will, don't allow the enemy to rob you of yours. Obedience is

far better than sacrifice. God Bless.

To pre-order your copy of Not by the World's Standards, A

Marriage Thrived Against the Odds! and for upcoming events

please visit www.boldenough2say.webs.com The next bi-monthly

book writing seminar is scheduled for July 20,2013, 10am-1:30pm, check above

website for details. My first book Bold Enough to Say! Is

available in paperback through the website as well as

www.createspace.com. Also available in e-book through

www.xlibris.com. For speaking engagements or questions

contact me directly at [email protected] MOTTO: It's not

just business, it's KINGDOM BUSINESS